It is time once again for First Pages, Would You Read On? We look forward to your comments on the following First Page:
Her foot was on the landing when she heard it, a message only the densest mother could fail to get-the sound of, Sara's bedroom door clicking shut.
At the top of the stairs, Karen's resolve failed and she hesitated, heart pounding, while she reminded herself to breathe. When exactly had she given away her authority to a sixteen-year-old? It was a rhetorical question; she didn't need an answer, she needed to make it through the next five minutes without an argument.
Behind the door, a Mozart sonata drifted into the hallway, harmonic vibrations to ease the civilized soul. Take a breath. What on earth was she doing, skulking in the hallway like a burglar in sheepskin slippers? Easy enough, one tiny nudge on the door. One-tiny-nudge. But she might as well be trying to push good-old Clara, parked in the garage; her limbs were paralyzed with fear, or weariness, or whatever the grief counselor called it, ennui. She wasn't even sure how to spell it, but the counselor said she had it-and Sara agreed.
Outside, a late-afternoon squall was blowing across Puget Sound, creasing the air with a grating noise, like fingernails on a blackboard. Nothing to worry about, Tom would have told her, just the Port Orford cedar scraping the final layer of paint off the side of the house. But Tom wasn't here; his opinion didn't count.
Tension drove pins into her brain as she considered her options: knock and risk another battle or simply retreat and let her daughter be late again.
Expunging her trepidation with a ragged sigh, she closed her eyes and gave the door a nudge.
The Big Reveal:
Last weeks First Page was shared by author, speaker and educator; Davalynn Spencer. Thank you Davalynn for offering your first page for our critique.
Here is the author's response to your comments:
Wow! You have no idea how excited I am about all the comments! (I know--I've already used too many exclamation points, but I'm really stoked, as my daughter would say.) The remarks are exactly what I was hoping to get, as in what works, what doesn't, what questions are unanswered, what doesn't seem believable. Thank for offering this venue; it inspires me to hone my work.